What Really Is Education?

I’d like to talk about education.

And I know what you’re thinking. You’re right – I’m not a teacher, or any sort of professional educator at all. I’m just a mother raising her kids as best as she can.

But hear me out.

I’ve learned, over this past decade of raising my children, that I do not need to be a teacher – or a professional anything at all – to educate my children.

And yes, teachers are very important.

I’ll never forget Morah Chani: a wonderful, warm, fun, creative woman who, to this day, loves telling stories and has a sweet word for any little girl she encounters.

Or Miss Goldberg, our smart, demanding, and dedicated English teacher with the most incredible lesson plans and detailed assignments that really pushed us to perform our best.

These teachers, along with many other devoted teachers like them, made a strong impression on me, and certainly played a big part in forming the person I am today.

And yet, reflecting on my youth, I recognize that they weren’t necessarily the biggest influence in my life.

The Meaning of Education

Education is a tricky idea, because it has a number of definitions that are often interchanged thoughtlessly.

The narrow definition of education – the one that shows up first in a Google search, and possibly in our minds too – is “the process of receiving or giving systematic instruction, especially at a school or university.”

But there is a much broader meaning to education too. One that more accurately reflects the meaning of “chinuch” in a Jewish sense, and one that also has a much stronger effect on the path a person’s life may take.

In its broader sense, education is a process of guiding, refining, influencing, and inspiring a person in a particular direction. It is the act of molding a child to behave in a particular way as they grow into adulthood and beyond.

Education is what gives a person his worldview, ethics and values, habits, social skills, emotional intelligence, creativity, adaptability, problem-solving skills, confidence, and sense of responsibility. Traits such as honesty, dependability, humility, empathy, kindness, modesty, loyalty – or their reverse – are effects of the education a person receives during their formative years.

And it is the quality of this education that determines a person’s level of success in life, far more than the scores they achieve in any educational institution.

How Education Happens

But this education does not happen because of any formal system.

This education happens in a home with predictable routines and a sense of order.

It happens over years of practicing cleanliness and hygiene, experience with household chores, and a peaceful and accepting home environment.

It happens through baking, sewing, swimming, gardening, or learning an instrument. Through learning to ride a bike, to navigate public transportation, or to stop a stranger to ask for directions.

Education happens when a child is helped through a personal struggle with patience and encouragement.

It happens when mistakes are allowed and forgiven, when differences are recognized and celebrated, and when relationships are nurtured and cherished.

In Yiddishkeit, chinuch is what instills in a person a sense of love and fear of Hashem, a love and commitment to the Torah and mitzvos, and a healthy sense of who they are and where they belong.

Chinuch happens in a kosher home, with two sets of dishes and separate ovens. Where brachos are made intentionally over every food eaten, where care is taken to avoid waste and meals are eaten with dignity.

It happens in a home where Shabbos is celebrated on a weekly basis, and Yom Tov is joyously prepared for and observed, each one in its season.

It happens in a home where negel vasser is washed regularly, nails are cut in a precise order, where tzedaka is given and mezuzahs hang on every door.

It happens in a home that welcomes guests with joy, where friends are enveloped and strangers respected.

It happens in a place where Jewish songs and tunes are played, and stories are told that inspire connection to Hashem and his Torah.

It happens in shul, where children gather together with their parents, grandparents, friends and neighbors to talk to Hashem, read from His Torah, and celebrate His holidays.

It happens where words of Torah are shared and discussed at mealtimes and meetings, by grandparents, parents, and friends. Where a rav is consulted, farbrengens are hosted and shiurim attended.

It happens at family gatherings and simchos, when Jewish values like family and mitzvos are celebrated and cherished in an atmosphere of love, joy, and friendship.

It happens where kindness, patience, empathy and love are shared and modeled, where children can see how a Jew treats his fellow with care.

It happens through exclamations of thanks to Hashem for happy events and expressions of prayer for help in times of trouble.

The Bottom Line

I am not a teacher, and I don’t know if I ever will be. But it was my Jewish education – in its broadest and most beautiful sense – which influenced me and inspired me in my choices every day of my life.

And I can provide the same to my children, simply by genuinely living the life that I believe in and making it one in which my children will want to take part.

So let’s talk more about education – about the true and complete definition of chinuch. Let’s own it, analyze it, and optimize the way we go about it.

I am not a teacher. But to my children, I may be the most significant teacher they will ever have.

P.s. I know many of you are waiting for news on the book. The latest update that we have is that they have all been printed (as of weeks ago) and are waiting to be shipped. Unfortunately due to the situation in the middle east and resulting instability with shipping routes, it has been delayed. But I will be sure to post an update the minute they are available, bezras Hashem. Everything in Hashem’s time <3 and thank you for your patience.

<3 Chaya